Unit 8: My two favorites...

The two practices I am most fond of are the subtle mind exercise in unit 5 and the Journey On guided relaxation exercise from unit 2.  Up until this term, I did not consider the health implications of having a mind busied with mental chatter. 

The concept of possessing a subtle mind had not occurred to me and the possibility of silencing my mind was unimaginable.  Most of my past attempts to meditate (outside prayer) have been futile.  In doing the exercise, I was able to catch a tiny glimpse of what it would be like to observe thoughts, images, feelings, without grasping on to them.  I realize that commitment and diligence would be required in order to cultivate a witnessing and subtle mind, but the availability of such means to train the mind provides me with hope.  This would be especially ideal during stressful times, as it would provide a break from the anxiety I so often experience when dealing with issues.  As a matter of fact, I may resort to practicing this exercise tonight, as an issue with my rental property has surfaced and I am trying to stave off anxiety :( I can only stand to benefit from learning to detach myself from anything negative associated with this particular issue.      

As a fan of guided relaxation meditations, I immediately took a liking to the unit 2 Journey On exercise.  This exercise is centered on the power of suggestion – a concept that shouldn’t be easily dismissed.  I am not promoting immediate gratification, but if you allow yourself to be open to this meditation, chances are, you will feel the effects of it without much delay.  Relaxation ensued within minutes of doing the exercise. 

I see the value in all of the exercises we’ve completed throughout the units, even those that I had difficulty with, such as the Loving Kindness meditation and Meeting Aesclepius.  I intend on repeating them.  I do realize the importance of including them in one’s routine, if it is integral health and human flourishing that one seeks in life.

Unit 7: Meeting Aesclepius

This exercise probably had an unintended effect on me.  When directed to conjure up an image of a wise person, I automatically envisioned Jesus Christ.  I guess it came so naturally as He embodies all the characteristics mentioned.  I had no qualms sitting in communion with Jesus and reflecting on His peace, wisdom, compassion, love and joy.  Furthermore, I thought the suggestion of the strong white beam of light very befitting.  It all felt right, up until the speaker directed me to allow the image to dissolve, enter my body and permeate within me, so that I BECOME this person – “What…become Jesus?” were my thoughts…yeah, I was a bit apprehensive about imagining myself as Jesus.  For the purpose of allowing the meditation to flow, I chose to improvise and pretended to hear “become LIKE this person”, so I thought, “Well, OK, I can certainly imagine myself being like Jesus, because I believe I am (we are) called to be God-like, Christ-like.  I have to admit that it sounds trifling, but I am only being honest about my exact thoughts during that precise moment.  I then imagined the Holy Spirit entering me and transforming my entire being into one of loving kindness and wisdom.  I also chose to ignore Aesclepius, as to acknowledge him as my inner essence would probably compromise my faith…I don’t know!  Anyway, it was extremely difficult to stay focused after that, as I had so many other thoughts and questions running through my mind and I couldn’t help but ruminate.  After the exercise was done, I reflected more on my reaction and how I was so affected by the suggestion of becoming Jesus.  Would I be blaspheming? By making these seemingly minute changes, did I defeat the purpose of this meditation?  I decided to write to a priest, explaining the exercise and my plight, so I'll have to wait and see what he has to say, if he responds.  I don’t think I am necessarily plagued by scrupulosity, I just don’t want to go about things with ignorance.  I suppose that in a sense, I was able to experience slight growth in my spirituality because as a result, I had a deep conversation with my husband, who is well-studied in the faith (spent 7 years in the seminary) and it also served as a reminder that we are all called to universal love, regardless of our faith background. 

A soon as I started reading page 477 of Consciousness & Healing, I was taken aback when I read “The ability to see the divine in everyone and treat each individual as though he or she were Christ…”  Not only did it somewhat address my issue with imagining myself as Jesus, but the topic of divinity in humans was part  of my discussion with my husband.  I just thought it was interesting to share that.  Anyway, the saying, “One cannot lead another where one has not gone himself” seems self-explanatory.  This takes us all the way back to earlier units where we had discussed practicing what one preaches and leading by example.  My expertise is meaningless if my actions contradict my teachings.  Moreover, how can I possibly expect my clients to heed my advice, follow my directions, etc., if I lack the experience to truly relate to them?  The blind leading the blind usually results in futility. 

Unit 6: Loving-kindness meditation and Integral assessment

The Loving-kindness meditation exercise is a pleasant and relatively easy one to complete.  I like how convenient it is.  I found that by doing this exercise, I felt a growing sense of peace within myself.  The words are so powerful that although I started the meditation without much feeling, repeating the phrases pulled me in so that I was able to say them with much fervor.  I did not expect that it would have that effect on me.  Despite not being able to meditate the full 10 minutes, I feel that I was still able to benefit because of the calm it had promoted.

In doing the integral assessment, I was able to understand more clearly the reason for and importance of its practice.  Of the four quadrants, I chose to focus on the biological.  Despite starting an exercise routine, I feel there are other areas within that quadrant that needs attention.  I feel I’ve neglected this aspect, in efforts to improve the others.  I started to reflect more on my growing interest in participating in a mind/body activity, such as Tai chi and thought about how much my entire self would benefit from it.  Another thought that repeatedly came to mind was nutrition. Admittedly, I do not make the best nutritional choices.  If I want to live a more integral life, I would surely have to change that.  I struggle with this because I am a major “foodie”.  It doesn’t help that I was brought up in a culture that emphasizes eating in social events…we have fiestas for every reason!  I felt very inclined to attend my chiropractor’s food makeover workshop.   I’ve been interested in attending his workshop but have put it off – this assessment forced me to admit that the reason for delay is because I fear this change…I am weak.

Overall, I thought these exercises extremely beneficial.  I hope to include both practices into my routine.     

Unit 5: Subtle Mind

I thought the Loving-Kindness and Subtle Mind exercises were entirely different.  My experience with the former did not work out to my expectations.  I had better luck with the Subtle Mind exercise, fortunately.  Up until this practice, I didn’t understand what detaching from a thought, feeling, or image was like.  During the exercise, when an invading thought or image surfaced, I imagined blowing it away with the out-breath.  Another helpful technique was using the sound of the waves to “remove” these random thoughts and images – almost as though I was sending them off to “ride the tide” and eventually disappear into the abyss.  Admittedly, I am far from acquiring a witnessing mind, but I feel as though I had a tiny glimpse of what it might be like.  I think I might have held on to my stake (breath) throughout the exercise. I felt that if I loosened my focus on my breath, even slightly, I would start grasping on to my thoughts.  Despite not being able to experience complete stillness and silence of the mind, I still feel good about eventually being able to detach from thoughts, and not ruminate as much.  

Throughout Dacher’s book, he’s repeatedly emphasized the interconnectedness of the mind, body, and spirit.  In striving for human flourishing – enduring health, wholeness, and genuine happiness – we must focus on the wellness of every aspect of the self.  We are looking at the whole, rather than just the sum of parts.  Everything I do, every choice I make, has its consequences on my health and my way of life.  When I start my day off on a positive note, it usually sets the stage for a great day.  When I exercise, chances are that I was able to pray, I probably avoided unhealthy foods, and I probably was more patient with others.  These positive actions are often a result of the overall sense of contentment and satisfaction I feel with actually doing something good for myself.  However, when I allow myself to stay cooped up indoors because it’s rainy and I have things I need to do at home, anyway, I find that I am less patient and accommodating with others…my mood will reflect the gloom that is often characteristic of the Pacific Northwest.